Episode 136: (Hasta la vista)
Previously in Leeford Village:
Frank plans to introduce ‘lion taming’ as an event at the village fête, and enlists Cody and Ted to help him. The parish council meets to plan more normal fête attractions. Colin Simpson reveals Councillor Lindale’s plan to merge Bordsley and Leeford, irrespective of the outcome of the recent census.
~
Meredith, almost fully recovered from her recent bout of salmonella, though still feeling fragile, sips her milky coffee, Ethel’s best attempt at a latte.
‘How are we going to tell Cody and Agnes? They’ll be devastated.’
Adam stirs a spoonful of sugar into his tea.
‘I’m sure they’ll understand. People do leave Leeford, occasionally. We have to better ourselves and Spain is the place to do it.’
Meredith nods her agreement.
‘It’s the suddenness of it that will be a shock to them. One minute you’re thinking of putting the Spanish house up for sale, just to get rid of it, and the next, we’re moving over there,’ she says.
Adam ceases stirring and places the teaspoon on the table. Meredith moves it onto the saucer.
‘Do I sense a change of heart coming here?’ he says.
‘No, no. Not at all,’ says Meredith, emphatically. ‘It’s the perfect opportunity for us. A coffee bar and gift shop, right next door to the house. It’s amazing that it came up for sale the same day you received the deeds from your grandmother’s estate. It’s as if it’s written in the stars.’
‘So, why the doubting voice?’
‘No doubting, love. I’m just worried about the effect it will have on Cody and Agnes. Their first grandchild will be born in Spain.’
Adam takes a gulp of tea.
‘They can come over whenever they want to. I’m sure they’ll still be very close to Manuel.’
‘Manuel?’
‘Our son. If he’s going to be born in Spain, he’ll need to have a Spanish name. Manuel José Thornton. How does that sound?’
The look on Meredith’s face lets Adam know that ‘Manuel José Thornton’ will not be the child’s name.
~
Frank Watson leaves Cody and Ted sitting in The Fields of Athenry, wondering how they have been duped into donning a lion costume.
Frank is about to get into his car when his phone rings. It’s a number he does not recognise.
‘Hello. Frank Watson,’ he says, wiping a bird dropping from the car roof with a paisley-patterned handkerchief.
‘Watson? Councillor Lindale here,’ says the voice on the other end of the phone.
Frank sighs.
‘What can I do for you, councillor?’
There is a long pause before Lindale speaks.
‘As you know, there was a recent census, conducted in both Bordsley and Leeford parishes. I have to say that the Bordsley census was carried out in a more professional manner. However, as unprofessional as the carrying out of the Leeford census was, and I’m not saying it was entirely your fault, Watson, the result is unambiguous.’
Frank drums on the roof.
‘And what result would that be, Lindale.’
‘Councillor Lindale. The result is that, subject to ratification by Banfield Council, Leeford will be absorbed into the parish of Bordsley. Naturally, there will be a formal ceremony to mark the merger, to which you and your ex-parish councillors will be invited.’
‘Absorbed, eh?’ says Frank. ‘And who is authorising this merger?’
‘It’s a formality, Watson. There’ll be lots of paperwork, as there always is with these things and we’ll keep you informed throughout the process.’
‘A formality? Like the building contracts in Birmingham? Were they a formality? And the work going on in East Banfield at the moment? I’d be very interested in seeing lots of paperwork for that, Lindale.’
There is silence at the other end of the phone.
‘I’m sorry, Lindale. I’m not hearing you very well. It must be a bad line,’ says Frank, opening his car door and swinging youthfully into the driver’s seat.
‘Listen, Watson. Frank. I think we need to have a meeting, just to go over the fine detail of the merger. I’m sure we can find a way that you can come out of all this in a manner that will be beneficial to you, personally.’
Frank starts the car.
‘There will be no meeting, Lindale. Though I will be visiting the council offices in the next couple of days. I’m not sure how much paperwork will be involved in your dismissal.’ He laughs loudly and ends the call.
~
Linda Cross is straining to hear the conversation between her sister, Sherry, and PC Carr, taking place in the street, in front of the half-closed front door. Though the Cross’s house is small, there is considerable distance between the sitting room at the back of the house and the street and neither Sherry, nor PC Carr’s voices are particularly loud.
After a few minutes, Linda hears the door close. She tries to look as though she has been occupied reading a magazine.
‘Did you hear any of that?’ asks Sherry, flopping down next to her sister on the sofa.
‘Hear what, Sher? Was there someone at the door?’ Linda licks her index finger and turns a page.
‘That’s quite a skill you know,’ says Sherry, with the hint of a smile.
‘What is?
‘Reading a magazine upside down.’
Linda drops the magazine onto her lap.
‘Oops,’ she says, sheepishly.
Sherry squeezes Linda’s hand.
‘It was Gary. He came to tell me about Carlos.’
‘Oh?’ says Linda, in mock surprise.
‘Don’t ‘oh’ me, sis. You know all about Carlos, don’t you?’
Linda squeezes Sherry’s hand.
‘I do. But I didn’t know how to tell you.’
Linda expects Sherry to burst into tears at any moment, but, to the surprise of both of them, Sherry remains calm and upbeat.
‘I’m well rid, Lin. Gary told me all about Carlos’s other women. I don’t know why I didn’t see it. I think Carlos’s father was trying to warn me off him, for my sake rather than Carlos’s.’
‘It’s called ‘love’, Sherry. It really is blind.’
Sherry sighs.
‘The thing is, I always suspected something was not quite right with Carlos. He was always so evasive. I never really knew who he was.’
‘No one did, Sherry. But, I must admit that he was very convincing. I think he did love you, actually.’
‘Yes, I’m sure he did. And I’m sure he loved all the others too.’
The sisters sit in thought for a few moments before Linda says, ‘you’re unusually calm about all this, Sis.’
Sherry laughs. ‘How did you expect me to be?’
Linda thinks. ‘Sad. Yes, that’s it. Sad. A few tears, maybe.’
‘Well there’ll be no tears shed over Carlos. He’s history as far as I’m concerned.’
‘You’ve got over him very quickly, I must say.’
Sherry sucks her top lip.
‘Yes. And you know why?’ She looks at the sister. ‘Because he called me a ‘silly girl’. No one calls me that, Lin. No one!’
Linda puts her arm round Sherry and pulls her close.
‘So, what happens to Carlos?’
Sherry nuzzles into Linda’s side.
‘He’s been arrested. They’ll be sending him back across the Atlantic as soon as they get the nod. He’s going to be extra-somethinged. Good riddance, Carlos. I’ve already moved on.’
~
Ted and Cody arrive back in the village. Ted has been searching for lion costumes on the internet and watching videos of various lion-themed performances, mostly taking place at children’s birthday parties, or pantomimes.
‘Fancy a swift half, Cody?’ asks Ted.
‘Actually, no, Ted. I fancy a large coffee and one of Ethel’s scones.’
Ted nods his agreement.
‘Okay, over to Ethel’s it is then.’
Five minutes later they are standing before the counter in Billy’s.
‘Hello, chaps. What can I get you?’
Ted and Cody look at the blackboard on the wall behind Ethel.
‘You certainly do a good range these days, Ethel. It’s hard to choose,’ says Ted.
Cody slaps his hand on the counter.
‘What I’d like is one of your legendary scones, with plenty of jam on, Ethel.’
Ethel shakes her head. ‘It must be a while since you last came to Billy’s. I haven’t done scones for ages.’
Cody looks disappointed.
‘Oh. Well, what else would you suggest that is scone-like?’
Ethel purses her lips.
‘There’s nothing like your scones, Ethel,’ says Ted. He looks at the pastries on display in a glass cabinet at the side of the counter. ‘I’ll have one of those custard tarts.’
‘You mean the pastel de nata.’
‘If you say so. Looks like a custard tart to me, though.’
Cody grunts his agreement.
Ethel places a pastel de nata on a plate.
‘What about you, Cody?’
‘I’ll have a slice of that cheesecake. Though I must say it looks a bit on the burnt side.’
‘That’s because it’s tarta de queso. It’s Spanish cheesecake,’ says Ethel.
‘Oh, is it now?’ smiles Cody. ‘What makes it Spanish?’
Ethel stares at the tarta de queso. ‘The burnt bit?’ she offers.
They all laugh.
‘Well, give me a slice of that and a large coffee,’ orders Cody. ‘Hey, Ted. Next time Sally burns something, tell her it doesn’t matter, it’s now Spanish.’ He playfully taps Ted on the arm.
Ethel turns to make the coffee and a tea for Ted, which she knows is the only hot drink he likes.
Cody picks off a piece of the tart with his fingers.
‘This is really nice, Ethel. I’ll never remember the name, but I’ll certainly have it again.’
Ethel finishes making the drinks.
‘Well, you can have lots of it whenever you visit Adam and Meredith in Spain.’
‘Visit in Spain?’ says Cody, licking his fingers. ‘What do you mean?’
‘Well, when they…oh, nothing. I’ve obviously got the wrong end of the stick. It’s just that I heard…’
Cody does not wait to hear the end of the sentence. He turns on his heels and is soon walking briskly away from Billy’s, towards Leeford Plaice.
‘Oh dear, I may have said something I shouldn’t have,’ says Ethel.
‘You may be right,’ says Ted, through a mouthful of tarta de queso. ‘This is very good. Shame Cody had to go.’
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